Ad Hudler - Ad Libbing

Ahh, the power of self-deception! (How to lose weight)
Wednesday, September 23, 2009

You know how you sometimes experience a moment of insight about yourself? It's as if you leave your body for a second and look down at yourself and see something, unfiltered, that you've never noticed before. Things like: Geez, I really have gotten negative. Or: Geez, my hair is really thinning out.

I had one yesterday, one of these flash of insights. Unfortunately. Or fortunately. I'm not sure which is true.

I was sitting at my computer and I looked down and saw a pup of a gut hanging over my belt line. Disbelieving, I sucked it in, then let it all out. Again: In and out. Nope. It was a gut, alright. And it was attached to MY body!

Now, I'd recently weighed myself and knew I'd gained weight, climbing from 218 to 228 ... but since I work out I told myself it was muscle weight, naturally. In fact, I'd told myself that my gut had even gotten SMALLER in the past few weeks! I told myself: I'm still wearing the same pair of jeans I've worn for two years. How can I have possibly gained weight if I can still wear the same pair of jeans, huh? You tell me that!

And then I realized, in another flash of insight: I AM NOT WEARING ANY PANTS, AND IT'S 3 O'CLOCK IN THE AFTERNOON!

Evidently, the jeans were too tight and I'd shed them some time after lunch ... and didn't even know it.

"How long have I been running around in my underwear?" I asked my wife.

She replied: "Uhhh, I don't know ... maybe the past five months?"

Hello, Weight Watchers? It's me, Ad.

6 Comments:

val said...: You are waaayy too young for this to happen! On the other hand, we "seniors" are doomed.....; September 23, 2009 9:45 AM
Ad Hudler said...: Val ... are you saying I'm fat!?!?!?; September 23, 2009 7:25 PM
val said...: No! YOU are saying that! I'm just saying you're too young to think you're falling apart! I'm just saying wait until you get older (it gets worse)! I'm just saying you're in great shape! I'm just saying.....oh, never mind....; September 23, 2009 7:53 PM
Ad Hudler said...: LOL!!! I was only kidding!; September 23, 2009 10:01 PM
Anonymous said...: Oh, you young'uns!
Listening to you guys on this subject is quite amusing . . . to a 70-year-old!
(Who, by now, could write a book on the subject!!)
Quite worrying about the negatives and concentrate on the positives.
You're still young.
You're strong.
You're healthy.
And did I mention young?; September 24, 2009 10:51 AM
Ad Hudler said...: Anon: You're right! I'm going to mellow out about this and start drinking gin EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!; September 24, 2009 12:14 PM