Ad Hudler - Ad Libbing

Reader Contest: What Am I?
Wednesday, September 10, 2008

To celebrate the upcoming release of my next hugely-autobiographical novel, "Man of the House," I am going to give a few riddles each week, leading readers to discover a mystery object that is within the pages of the book. Winner (and if there's more than one I will draw a name from the hat) will get five autographed copies of the book for his or her book club. Or I could inscribe personal messages in them for Christmas gifts. But you cannot use the books as fire-starter -- I really draw the line there. (I just heard on National Public Radio that it's expected to be a colder-than-normal winter for North America.)

So: Here's riddle #1: I mimic an old-time playground game. Some might call me repetitious.

And, as promised, here is last night's Gin Count: Two gins-with-lemon-and-bitters, about 8 ounces in total.
ADJUSTMENT AND RATIONALIZATION: I drank them two hours apart, so I'm not really sure if I have to count that second one because I showed such remarkable restraint ... and it shows I was drinking for the TASTE, not the buzz. Are you with me here? Also: I had no tonic or cranberry juice or any other high-calorie mixer. Also, I made a really good dinner of portugese stir-fry...kind of a curry with asparagus and chicken ... plus, I did let that lady cut in today on McGregor Boulevard during rush hour ...

So ... if I'm doing my math right ... taking all these things into consideration ... I think it is fair to compute that I had a NEGATIVE amount of gin last night.....I come up with minus-13 ounces.

Is that what you got? Am I correct?

3 Comments:

Ad Hudler said...: guesses received so far via email:
1. red rover
2. a lazy susan; September 10, 2008 11:45 AM
geeky Heather said...: The Can-Can! You know, from "Kick the can"? Nevermind.

And sorry, dude, but I calculated 9 ounces, due to all the rationalization.; September 10, 2008 6:26 PM
Ad Hudler said...: Nope. Not the can-can....but good guess.

ANd thanks for weighing in on the gin count...You might want to get new batteries in that calculator ;); September 10, 2008 10:15 PM